Tired , cold , hungry

I am constantly tired , cold and hungry . Winter isnt as fun as it was . Its over cast and cloudy and there is a sharp , damp cold in the air and a feeling like you get on Christmas day . Not in a positive way though , just as in its a day thats set apart from normality . Its very easy to confuse the two . I remember a day years ago like this but with a windy afternoon . I got an intense feeling a big change was ahead and that life was not going to be the same again , how right I was then . Well that feeling  is back once more today .
    Strangely ( isnt it always ? ) this full moon I have the house all to myself again . This is becoming a habit . The moon has been moving females to and through no doubt . This is becoming particularly strong with this moon in its hazy mood . I have seen the effects , though have yet to see their out come .
    Its time for a change of reading matter so out goes fiction and in comes something of teaching by Aliester Crowley . Having enjoyed his novel Moon Child immensely I was fascinated by his ideas of Tao and the act of deliberately contradicting your views or desires in order to achieve an out come . Both these ideas interest me and tantalise me . I suppose how many times have you taken an action to find it was a waste of time and you should have actually done the opposite action ? Will doing the opposite action to what you would expect cheat life's habit of thwarting your plans ? This is my new area of interest !