Ive been grappling for a year or two with trying to make sense of all the chaos I see around me in this valley. Trying to decide if it is normal or not. Today it hit me. Everything is fucked, eventually. Our health, surroundings, home and family, and ultimately ourselves. Entropy wins.
When we are young we cannot see it. Each generation starts off blind to it and by the time their eyes are opened another generation is setting off on that same journey completely unaware of what is ahead. They have been doing this since the dawn of man.
This can be seen simply when looking at other peoples lives over the years. You see the pattern that wont abate. It never stops you know. What has been created is also destroyed. If you are unlucky this will occur earlier in your life than in others.
Yesterday I came across a local who had been involved with two cyclists in a collision. One was on the floor sat grimacing and holding her leg. The woman was riding a quad bike. She was the Sister to the woman who lost her child due to her father reversing his pick-up truck.
I recognised intimately the look on her face because ive been there myself. There was frustration, annoyance, apathy and general despair at her situation. Why me ? Sometimes when youve caused something bad to happen to someone else the only way through is to dis- associate slightly from it, and feel annoyed after all you have already been through. The despair and futility of it all. Living on a single track road with blind corners that now is a very real hazard as more tourists navigate them. Its become an occupational hazard. Cold and un-emotional and illogical making a person feel helpless.
And we are helpless. What will be will be.
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