Very strange. My hearing has gone quite overly sensitive tonight, and I know what has triggered this. It sounds silly, but the roofers next door have been particularly noisy today. Its not the loud music they play, but the shouting conversations they have with one another. Their voices are oddly jarring ,and at a certain deep pitch that resonates through me. The shouting sounds as you would use in a moment of anger, or if some sudden dangerous situation was about to happen, but they are only having casual conversations, but my brain doesnt realize this. Their surly accents dont help either, they're are a mixture of what sounds like to me as a Liverpool or Preston accent or something in between. They shout their heads off everyday. I dont know how anyone can be so jovial all day. I know they are in their twenties, but I sometimes think they are " on something ". Maybe its just youth ?
My wife and daughter are visiting our neighbor who used to live next door this weekend. She lives in Preston now. She used to be a psychotherapist. Its a pity she moved just before my problems started. Im in good spirits at the moment and my physical variations of symptoms does not seem to match up with my moods. This is just a blip though, but annoying all the less.
https://www.facebook.com/reel/786546299062474
I came across this on YouTube shorts. You may, or not like it, but I couldnt believe the number of negative comments by men ! Maybe women, yes. But men ? Times are changing and attitudes have changed. Have young men changed or are they just towing the feminist line that has been forced upon them ? I think they are lying, or have succumbed to double speak.
Maybe I'm a dinosaur ? This is a trivial short. A mans instant reaction should be mmmmm ! Society is in trouble if men are dissing a sexual archetype. They are fighting their base instincts. This will not end well.
Now notice that all women openly express a old fashioned male type of lust for the stereotype male stripper, and thats ok ? They dont engage their brains and consider the social implications or gender stereotypes do they ? Maybe the role have reversed ? No, one sex continues as before while the other seems to be beating itself up ! One has been taught to feel guilty, and the other goes scott free. No wonder men are confused.
I think Ive reached the stage where I want to find out what the route cause of my condition is. Recently my sinus pain, tinnitus and hearing sensitivity have worsened slightly, and I want to find out why. I still feel I am missing a part of the jigsaw, and its with this in mind that I am considering seeing a councilor. The question is do I go for a traditional NHS one as suggested by my doctor, or do I visit a more " alternative " one that I know of ?
I feel I have a esoteric side to my troubles as suggested by objects that move 30 seconds after ive touched them. I cant deny that this is high on my mind in all of this. Or am I the victim of some chemical problem ? If its a mental issue then I need to know. Although ive functioning well at the moment Im still in some discomfort everyday, and where has this slightly anxious feeling come back from ? Im waking with palpitations again most mornings. Something seems to have triggered this again to some extent, but why ?
I realized today that I am not sure who I am anymore after this past year. Its going to take time to discover this new person. Its that simple.
What happened next was un-nerving. I heard the sound of movement inside the tub of various pill boxes. At first it was just a rustle, then after about maybe 6 rustles came the sound of a box of pills being rattled, as if by the hand of a person. Both my wife and daughter heard the sounds, and I thought it sounded like a mouse in the box as the noises continued for maybe 15 seconds. Of course there was no mouse in the tub.
This is only the second time that a noise has lasted long enough to examine it. Usually its just a single noise or movement that occurs with an object. You are are never quite sure if you have imagined it. I know one thing though, this often occurs after ive just touched an object or put it down. I know someone who says it could be my aura ? Its also nice when other people are present when these things happen. My daughter loves it, but my wife doesn't care a hoot. Both are good outlooks as there is nothing worse than living in denial or trying to sweep it under the carpet. It will just emerge again, maybe to the next generation and they need to be prepared for these things in their house.
My mother still denies anything strange ever happened in this house, though I remember the instances even though they tried to hide them from us as children. My dad is the same. They both just look puzzled when I mention anything nowadays. I dont know why. The cats long out of the bag.
A night of strange dreams.
I dreamed of my own face as though i was looking at it.
UPDATE : All was revealed when I met my a cousin who looks like me driving up the valley to meet his inlaws. I have not seen him for 10 years, but he still looks very like me.
